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11 Ways to Deal with an Angry Spouse

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What happens when your spouse has a storm brewing inside of him or her? How do you deal with the out of nowhere outbursts, punishing silent treatment and hurtful words? How can you have a loving relationship when your spouse’s anger is running rampant? Is your only choice to grin and bear it or should you pack your bags and leave your angry spouse?

If you know that this angst is a foreign entity and it will not escalate into physical or verbal abuse, and if your relationship is truly worth saving because you know that there is no greater love, then here are eleven tips to help you stay afloat during those ebbs and flows.

1. Create a reflection space for yourself. Create a place in your home where you can reflect on the good in your spouse and your relationship. Put favorite photos of the two of you or other cherished mementoes there. Create a playlist of love songs that send you down memory lane or make you want to turn off the lights Teddy Pendergrass style. Envision the husband or wife who made you laugh, wrote you love poems, supported your aspirations, and stayed up all night with your sick child so you could get some rest. Let those recollections weave through your heart so that your spouse’s season of anger won’t overwhelm you.

2. Don’t personalize your spouse’s anger. Don’t buy into the “If only’s.” If only I was a better cook, cleaned the house more, made more money, lost weight, etc., my spouse wouldn’t be so full of rage. The changes you make may make your spouse happy momentarily, but the root of his or her anger is much deeper, and the changes you make are only a temporary fix.

3. Although it may be difficult not to, don’t lash back. When you refuse to be a combater your spouse will have no choice but to calm down and interact with you in a more positive way.

4. Discuss with your spouse the importance of leaving a legacy of what a healthy relationship looks like for your children. Discuss negative traits that were passed on to both of you from your extended families and how it affected each of your lives. Talk about ways you can break the cycle and not pass these negative traits on.

5. Validate, validate, validate. Sometimes those who are the angriest and the most unlovable need the most validation. Your spouse may seem confident, but when you peel back the layers, there may be a lot of insecurities, so focus on making more positive comments than negative. You can also gift your spouse with a self-help book to help change his or her inner mindset.

Fill your spouse’s life with laughter. Laughter is healing. Put funny jokes on the refrigerator, text jokes to each other, make silly faces, watch a Kevin Hart or Tyler Perry movie. It’s hard to stay mad when you’re laughing so hard it hurts in a good and healthy way.

7. Write your spouse a letter. A letter is less confrontational and you can get your points across without being cut off. Try not to point the finger but voice your concerns about how you feel.

8. Don’t be a scapegoat. If you did something to anger your spouse admit it, ask for forgiveness, and make amends. But don’t be so ridden with guilt about your transgressions that you allow him or her to verbally abuse you. Be loving but firm about setting boundaries in how you will be treated.

9. Get intervention. If your spouse can’t get a handle his or her anger, seek help from a counselor. Even if your spouse refuses to accompany you, go so that you’ll learn ways to cope.

10. Don’t expect perfection. There’ll be days when your spouse’s anger is triggered due to just the daily grind of living. Put the children to bed early or go for a drive and allow him or her to vent. Be that listening ear he or she may need.

11. Love your spouse unconditionally. We would never stop loving our two year old for throwing a temper tantrum, or our sixteen year old for rebelling. We would be there, even when they try our patience. Find ways to show your spouse how much you appreciate him or her and don’t forget to get the children involved. The little ones can make cards, the older ones can cook a special dinner. In time, with your unwavering love and prayers and constructive countermeasures, your spouse’s angry outbursts will be few and far between.

Source: blackandmarriedwithkids.com

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Health and Food

Avoid These Nigerians Food To Burn Stubborn Belly Fat (Video)

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Being overweight or obese can be detrimental to your health. It is not advisable to have excess fat in the abdominal cavity because it can lead to some health issues. Getting your dream body will not be easy and you need to make some sacrifices to your diet. You will also need to turn a blind eye to some fatty foods.

If you’re ready to get rid of the belly fat, then stay put as Information Nigeria brings you some important tips that will help.

1. Avoid sugar and carbonated drinks

Did you know that consuming sugary substances like coke, fanta can lead to weight gain and a number of health problems like high blood pressure?. This is due to the high fructose content found in added sugars. Taking sugar-filled drinks may slow your metabolism and this in turn can make it harder for your body to burn fat. Fructose can only be metabolized by your liver. When you consume too much, you push your liver to its limit and it becomes overloaded, then it turns the fructose into fat and it ends up getting stored in your belly. To avoid putting yourself from risk, you should cut back on foods and drinks that contain huge amounts of sugar.

 

2. You also have to forgo junk foods like meat pie, cakes, rolls, candies, burgers, ice cream and cookies. You also need to do away with heavy foods like eba, akpu, pounded yam, rice among others. Switch up your eating habits and opt for a more balanced-diet if you want to burn your belly fat. Avoid consuming refined carbs like bread, pizza, potation chips etc. You should also stay away from processed and heavy foods because they contribute to stubborn belly fat. You should choose to eat proteinous foods like fish, eggs, and milk. starch contains fat, sugar and salt. They help a person feel fuller so you don’t end up looking for something to munch on after eating. It basically keeps hunger at bay.

3. Eat the right amount of fruits, vegetables, fibrous foods and whole grains – You can add vegetables, fruits and whole grains to your weight loss diet. They provide essential vitamins, minerals, fiber and other substances that are good for your body. Examples of fibre rich foods include; beans, broccoli, avocados, apples, oatmeal brown rice and whole grain bread.

4. Try to incorporate exercise into your daily or weekly routine – Exercise helps to speed up your metabolism and helps you shed weight. The bitter truth is that wearing just waist trainers and staying put in one position will not make you lose that stubborn belly fat. You should hit the gym.

5 Reduce alcohol intake – Excess intake of alcohol also leads to a host of health problems especially the build-up of fat in the belly area. Have you ever noticed that those who drink alcohol, especially men, often develop ‘pot-bellies’. Alcoholic drinks like beer provide your body with calories and very little nutrients. It can also increase your appetite. Replace the alcoholic drinks with water or alternate with low calorie, non-alcoholic beverages. Too much alcohol can cause liver damage and other serious health problems.

6. Try out apple cider vinegar – Apple cider vinegar is made in a two-step fermentation process. It is obtained from apples that have been crushed, distilled and fermented. Acetic acid is the main active component of apple cider vinegar. It is safe for consumption in small quantities and can be taken as a supplement. Do not also consume it straight from the bottle or in its pure form. Add 1 to 2 tablespoons to water before you drink. You can also add honey or lemon. It is best to drink it before your meals. Research shows it has many health benefits, such as lowering blood sugar levels.

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Entertainment

Williams Uchemba And His Wife Exchange Wedding Vows In Lagos (Video)

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Williams Uchemba and his wife, Brunella Oscar

Williams Uchemba and his wife, Brunella Oscar

Popular Nigerian actor, Williams Uchemba and his wife, Brunella Oscar have officially solemnized their union.

The couple finally exchanged their wedding vows at Dominion city church in Lagos state.

The beautiful wedding ceremony was reportedly officiated by the founder of the church, Dr. David Chukwudi Ogbueli alias Papa Eagle.

Celebrities, fans and well-wishers poured in congratulatory message for the couple after photos and videos from the ceremony hit the internet.

The actor wore a sleek tuxedo, while his bride,  wore a lovely white gown.

Read Also:Actor Williams Uchemba Set To Walk Down The Aisle With Mystery Woman

Watch the videos below:

https://twitter.com/gregorogholi/status/1330121905387540483?s=21

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Entertainment

Actor, Model, Comedian, Philanthropist… Meet The Latest Groom, Williams Uchemba

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Williams Uchemba

Williams Uchemba

Williams Uchemba, who was born on October 22, is an actor, motivational speaker, model, comedian, entrepreneur and philanthropist. The Abia-born thespian graduated with a Bachelor’s Degree in International Relation from the University of Nigeria, Nsukka in Enugu State.

Uchemba began his career in the early 2000s as a child actor and came into the limelight in 2001 after appearing in the Nollywood blockbuster movie, “The Journey of the Dead” along with Olu Jacobs, Ramsey Noah, and Pete Edochie.

Since then, the multi-talented actor never looked back as he has gone ahead to feature in more blockbuster movies like Sugar Rush (2019), Merry Men 2(2019) and Story Story: The African Rideshare (2018). He is the recipient of several awards.

The actor adopted an 18-year-old furniture maker in June and he promised to sponsor his education. He recently got married to his longtime girlfriend, Brunella Oscar at her hometown, Alor in Anambra state. The actor’s wife, Brunella opened up on their love story with Wedding Digest Naija and she disclosed that she made the first move. According to the English trained medical doctor, they both met on Facebook after she sent him a message.

 

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