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5 Ways to Find and Foster Good Friendships

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When Charlotte Mata moved from California to New York three years ago, she left behind a close-knit group of friends she’d known since childhood. Although starting over can be intimidating, Mata’s outgoing personality helped her win over a new group of friends—and even fiancé—before long.“When I moved, I met friends at work and I went around and ate at restaurants in the neighborhood to meet people,” said Mata. “I started conversations with people I felt would be interesting to talk to and worked on joined community projects to meet people with similar interests.”

Unlike Mata, many women are more timid when it comes to introducing themselves to others and struggle with forming lasting friendships. If you’re looking to meet and keep new friends, here are some tips from Shasta Nelson, CEO of GirlFriendCircles.com, a women’s friendship matching website and author of Friendships Don’t Just Happen! The Guide to Creating a Meaningful Circle of GirlFriends on how to foster these friendships:

Be Social

It’s important to get out and meet people, just as Mata did and still does. You can’t expect to make friends by staying at home. Instead, you need to hit the town or engage in community activities. “It seems obvious, but you’d be surprised how many people don’t have the friends they want and yet never choose activities and environments that help them meet new people,” says Nelson.

“A huge piece of this step too, is being open to who you do meet,” suggests Nelson. “Research shows that you don’t need to have religion, economics, relationship status, or political views in common to bond; you only need to eventually find a few areas of commonality.”

Initiate Repeatedly

Mata often invites friends out for a night on the town or hosts charity events as a way to get to know new people, but not all women will do so in return. “In an ideal world, someone else would do all the inviting, scheduling and planning for the two of you to connect,” says Nelson. “But in this world, some of us are either more motivated to do it at certain times, have more time to do it, or have the skills and gifts to do it.”

Ultimately, if you want to make friends, then you’ll need to put forth the effort. A mutual relationship doesn’t mean you both initiate evenly; it just means that as the friendship progresses you both end up contributing in different ways that are meaningful, according to Nelson. “But a friendship can’t get off the ground without time together and that means it has to be initiated repeatedly to give it momentum for you two to get to know each other.”

Keep It Positive

Nobody wants to be thought of as a ‘Debbie Downer’ or someone who brings down the mood of those around them. Keeping a positive outlook and knowing how to have fun will make others want to be around you.

“No one woke up this morning wanting one more needy, complaining and exhausting person in their life,” says Nelson. “In the beginning stages of a new friendship, you need to make deposits of laughter, affirmation, fun, hope and generosity before you can someday make withdrawals of favors, complaining, and tears. Make it your goal to have people leave your presence feeling better about themselves and their lives for having spent time with you.”

Increase Your Vulnerability

Over time, it’s important to let new friends in as we begin to trust them more; this is vital to strengthening the bonds we share. “We can show up with authenticity from the very beginning, but that’s different from vomiting our story on someone we don’t know well,” says Nelson. “Hearing our hearts is the role of a very good friend. If we don’t have that in our lives right now, we must build up to it without confusing the difference between what we expect from new friends versus established friends,” advises Nelson. “We increase our vulnerability as the commitment to the relationship increases. We should share incrementally, see that it’s received well and that sharing is ultimately mutual before going too much deeper.”

However, before we can allow ourselves to become vulnerable around a new friend, we have to be able to trust him or her completely. This is something Diana Young learned several years ago while making new friends after moving to Alabama. “Meaningful friendships are based on trust; trust means that a friend will be there in your time of need and that you can depend on them for even the smallest of favors,” says Young. “Trust also means you can divulge your deepest and darkest secrets—and while a friend won’t judge, they will be completely honest with you.”

Practice Forgiveness

It’s important to keep in mind that no friend will ever be perfect or do exactly as we expect. “We’ll disappoint each other as we learn how to dance with each other,” says Nelson. “We’ll find qualities that annoy us, choices they’ve made that we disagree with and expectations that they didn’t live up to, but one of the most important roles of friendship is to practice forgiving those around us for not being perfect.” It’s impossible to build a long-lasting and meaningful friendship without some disappointment and forgiveness along the way.

In the end, just remember that creating new friendship begins with you. “It starts with being honest with yourself and who you are—and accepting yourself as you are,” says Mata. When you can be genuine to yourself, you can then treat each other with the utmost respect and kindness. It’s about being open to learning about others and even learning more about yourself. Every relationship—even friendship—takes work. Understanding this helps make a friendship more meaningful. “It’s also about taking the good with the bad and simply loving and enjoying every step you take with each other.”

 

Source: galtime.com

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Health and Food

Avoid These Nigerians Food To Burn Stubborn Belly Fat (Video)

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Being overweight or obese can be detrimental to your health. It is not advisable to have excess fat in the abdominal cavity because it can lead to some health issues. Getting your dream body will not be easy and you need to make some sacrifices to your diet. You will also need to turn a blind eye to some fatty foods.

If you’re ready to get rid of the belly fat, then stay put as Information Nigeria brings you some important tips that will help.

1. Avoid sugar and carbonated drinks

Did you know that consuming sugary substances like coke, fanta can lead to weight gain and a number of health problems like high blood pressure?. This is due to the high fructose content found in added sugars. Taking sugar-filled drinks may slow your metabolism and this in turn can make it harder for your body to burn fat. Fructose can only be metabolized by your liver. When you consume too much, you push your liver to its limit and it becomes overloaded, then it turns the fructose into fat and it ends up getting stored in your belly. To avoid putting yourself from risk, you should cut back on foods and drinks that contain huge amounts of sugar.

 

2. You also have to forgo junk foods like meat pie, cakes, rolls, candies, burgers, ice cream and cookies. You also need to do away with heavy foods like eba, akpu, pounded yam, rice among others. Switch up your eating habits and opt for a more balanced-diet if you want to burn your belly fat. Avoid consuming refined carbs like bread, pizza, potation chips etc. You should also stay away from processed and heavy foods because they contribute to stubborn belly fat. You should choose to eat proteinous foods like fish, eggs, and milk. starch contains fat, sugar and salt. They help a person feel fuller so you don’t end up looking for something to munch on after eating. It basically keeps hunger at bay.

3. Eat the right amount of fruits, vegetables, fibrous foods and whole grains – You can add vegetables, fruits and whole grains to your weight loss diet. They provide essential vitamins, minerals, fiber and other substances that are good for your body. Examples of fibre rich foods include; beans, broccoli, avocados, apples, oatmeal brown rice and whole grain bread.

4. Try to incorporate exercise into your daily or weekly routine – Exercise helps to speed up your metabolism and helps you shed weight. The bitter truth is that wearing just waist trainers and staying put in one position will not make you lose that stubborn belly fat. You should hit the gym.

5 Reduce alcohol intake – Excess intake of alcohol also leads to a host of health problems especially the build-up of fat in the belly area. Have you ever noticed that those who drink alcohol, especially men, often develop ‘pot-bellies’. Alcoholic drinks like beer provide your body with calories and very little nutrients. It can also increase your appetite. Replace the alcoholic drinks with water or alternate with low calorie, non-alcoholic beverages. Too much alcohol can cause liver damage and other serious health problems.

6. Try out apple cider vinegar – Apple cider vinegar is made in a two-step fermentation process. It is obtained from apples that have been crushed, distilled and fermented. Acetic acid is the main active component of apple cider vinegar. It is safe for consumption in small quantities and can be taken as a supplement. Do not also consume it straight from the bottle or in its pure form. Add 1 to 2 tablespoons to water before you drink. You can also add honey or lemon. It is best to drink it before your meals. Research shows it has many health benefits, such as lowering blood sugar levels.

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Entertainment

Williams Uchemba And His Wife Exchange Wedding Vows In Lagos (Video)

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Williams Uchemba and his wife, Brunella Oscar

Williams Uchemba and his wife, Brunella Oscar

Popular Nigerian actor, Williams Uchemba and his wife, Brunella Oscar have officially solemnized their union.

The couple finally exchanged their wedding vows at Dominion city church in Lagos state.

The beautiful wedding ceremony was reportedly officiated by the founder of the church, Dr. David Chukwudi Ogbueli alias Papa Eagle.

Celebrities, fans and well-wishers poured in congratulatory message for the couple after photos and videos from the ceremony hit the internet.

The actor wore a sleek tuxedo, while his bride,  wore a lovely white gown.

Read Also:Actor Williams Uchemba Set To Walk Down The Aisle With Mystery Woman

Watch the videos below:

https://twitter.com/gregorogholi/status/1330121905387540483?s=21

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Entertainment

Actor, Model, Comedian, Philanthropist… Meet The Latest Groom, Williams Uchemba

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Williams Uchemba

Williams Uchemba

Williams Uchemba, who was born on October 22, is an actor, motivational speaker, model, comedian, entrepreneur and philanthropist. The Abia-born thespian graduated with a Bachelor’s Degree in International Relation from the University of Nigeria, Nsukka in Enugu State.

Uchemba began his career in the early 2000s as a child actor and came into the limelight in 2001 after appearing in the Nollywood blockbuster movie, “The Journey of the Dead” along with Olu Jacobs, Ramsey Noah, and Pete Edochie.

Since then, the multi-talented actor never looked back as he has gone ahead to feature in more blockbuster movies like Sugar Rush (2019), Merry Men 2(2019) and Story Story: The African Rideshare (2018). He is the recipient of several awards.

The actor adopted an 18-year-old furniture maker in June and he promised to sponsor his education. He recently got married to his longtime girlfriend, Brunella Oscar at her hometown, Alor in Anambra state. The actor’s wife, Brunella opened up on their love story with Wedding Digest Naija and she disclosed that she made the first move. According to the English trained medical doctor, they both met on Facebook after she sent him a message.

 

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