Dear Tee,
I am about getting married to a man I do not love. We have been together for 6 years and this is the reason I want to marry him – PITY! He is 10 years older than I am and he gets angry easily. We would be getting married very soon because we have had our introduction already and the wedding date has been fixed. I don’t know if I really want this because no matter how I think about it I am not ready to get married now. One thing I am sure of the fact that he loves me so much and he cannot let me go. Please, what should I do?
Bm.
Dear Bm,
I am sorry about this. Anyway, I would not advise you to marry someone you do not love. There is something called ‘PERSONAL CONVICTION’, this means you must believe in your heart, deep within you that this is who you really love and want to be with. If you are not in the marriage yet and you don’t feel a connection to your husband, how do you want to relate in the marriage? Listen, people fall out of love in marriage, but what still keeps them together is the bond that has been there from the start…..and with this they fall in love again with themselves in the marriage. There should be this kind of mutual connection and feelings between you and your spouse, it shouldn’t be one sided….you should love someone you want to marry as well….It’s not just about him loving you. Fine, you have had your introduction, but it doesn’t mean you are married to him, it doesn’t mean you are under any obligation to marry him except you have a legal type of introduction which I don’t think exist in this country. You can still pull out now while you can, sure it’s going to hurt him…..but it is better to hurt someone with the truth than comfort him with a lie. You should know the best way to let him know…
Also, you can tell him you need time to think straight, think about it deeply…. Give yourself some break and think well, then go for what you know you really deserve and would not regret over in the long run.
Wish you the best,
Tee.
Dear tee, am 26 and dating a girl 4 over 6 years now but, this girl suddenly change she cant call,text or even flash me,and whenever i call on her she will sometimes not pick and i love so much n cant afford to loose her. and finally my best friend is d one dating her n i still love her.pls tell me what to do before i take d wrong decision. mathew A.I
I think you have no choice, go ahead and mary him or remain spinster. The choice is yours cos 2get decent man lyk him is not easy!!!!